Dysfunctional relationships in "Interpreter of Maladies"

Throughout Jhumpa Lahiri’s Interpreter of Maladies we see many, many dysfunctional marriages. In fact, we see more marriages that are falling apart than not. We first see a less than functional marriage in “A Temporary Matter”, the very first story. In “A Temporary Matter” Shukumar and Shoba’s broken relationship is put on display when they begin confessing things to each other when the power goes out. The couple’s marriage has been going downhill since the still birth of their baby, especially due to the fact that the husband wasn’t even there for the birth. At the end of the story the Shoba admits that she has plans to move out, implying the end of their marriage.

One of the strangest relationships we see is Mr. and Mrs. Das’. In this story, the title track as Mr. Mitchell would say, “Interpreter of Maladies”, not only do we see an unfaithful and unhealthy marriage, but we see Mrs. Das’ odd fixation on Mr. Kapasi. I interpreted her fixation to be a way to make Mr. Das jealous. Or maybe she’s just craving something new and interesting, and Mr. Kapasi fulfills that. Either way, I saw her detachment from her family very strange. The biggest relationship stumbling block we see in this story is definitely her child born from wedlock, Bobby. We see that this is clearly something that weighs very heavily on Mrs. Das, so much that she chooses to share this secret with Mr. Kapasi when the rest of her family is touring India. Mr. and Mrs. Das’ relationship is clearly strained/not there at all, and no matter what Mrs. Das chooses to do about Bobby (tell Mr. Das versus keep it a secret) it will continue to weigh heavily on their relationship and family.

We see this again in “Sexy”, a very familiar story about an affair between a young woman, Miranda, and an older man Dev. A love story that involves a married man can never be a healthy one. As most of these stories go, Miranda ends up leaving Dev, but not after numerous attempts to change herself for him (for example, learning Indian).

In “This Blessed House” we see an obviously different newly married/newly introduced couple, Sanjeev and Twinkle, yes, Twinkle, quarreling over multiple things. It begins as an argument over the Christian relics Twinkle begins to find in their new home. Twinkle sees it as a fun game, and doesn’t mind putting the figurines up in their home. Sanjeev on the other hand, is completely against these objects. Sanjeev’s family is still living in India, and he seems to have a more devout Hindu faith than Twinkle. Sanjeev doesn’t want the relics on display when he has his work friends over for a party, for he fears they will think he and Twinkle practice Christianity (which, admittedly, many guests do). During the party, which Sanjeev spent all morning preparing for, Twinkle quickly becomes the center of attention. This seems to greatly upset Sanjeev, especially since they’re his colleagues, and he planned the party. At the end of this story we’re left with Sanjeev carrying a large bust of Jesus Christ downstairs in front of all the party guests, and questions about the future of their marriage.

All of these stories have the same theme of a dysfunctional relationship. This is the majority of Lahiri’s stories so far. It makes me wonder if this was her intention, or if perhaps the stories just evolved like that. It’s an interesting way to connect all of these seemingly unconnected stories. I’m interested to see how Lahiri ends this collection of short stories.

Privilege and Relationships

I've grown up in a good home. My parents get along, we don't struggle with money, we have never had any major health issues, and we have dinner on the table every night. For me, this life is normal. But for other families, they all have a different version of "normal". Some families might have divorced parents, some might be an only child, some may have a sick family member. It's not always the happy little family. As we saw in Junot Diaz's Fiesta, 1980 and Ysreal, family dynamics vary.

For Rafa and Yunior, their abusive father and submissive mother is their version of a normal family. They've never known anything else. In situations like this, often the children will grow up to have relationships that mirror their parents'. I can definitely see Rafa growing up to become an abusive husband/father. The amount of abuse he sees, and seems to feel no emotions towards, would make me think he would be more likely to develop similar tendencies. Especially because he seems to be Papi's "favorite". We also see Rafa almost respecting his father's ability to have a mistress, a reflection on Rafa's own sexual prowess. On the other hand, I cannot picture Yunior growing up to become abusive. The amount of compassion and emotion he displays in Fiesta, 1980, makes me think that he will grow up determined to differ from his father. Rafa never even considers telling Mami about father's affair, but it is a big issue that weighs on Yunior. This makes me think he couldn't do that to someone else.

Another relationship we see is in Aurora. In this story, the main relationship is between Aurora and Lucero. We see an interesting dynamic in this relationship. Neither Aurora or Lucero are in the clear in terms of being "innocent". We see both characters be abusive, manipulative, mean, and possible unfaithful. But does this make it okay if they both do it? That's a question that's been weighing on me. Anyway, while I was reading Aurora I definitely did not read it as a love story. Though it is a story about a boy and a girl who are physically intimate, I didn't think a relationship that abusive could be a loving one.

During our class discussion yesterday, the idea that perhaps this relationship was okay in their situation was brought up. The analogy of a "war zone" and their lives was repeatedly brought up. If their lives were in shambles, is it okay for their relationship to be too? Somehow this didn't legitimize their love story for me. But as I've continued thinking about their relationship, I've realized that I come from a place of privilege. I have never been abused. I have never lived in a home with abuse. I have never been to juvie. I have never been a drug addict. I have never lived in the "rough" part of New Jersey. So who am I, a privileged white girl, to judge Aurora and Lucero's relationship? Do I think it's healthy? No. Would most privileged people think it was healthy? Also no. But Aurora and Lucero are not privileged. So does this change the nature of how we view their relationship?

I was inspired by last night's reading...

You start reading the book at 9:14 pm. You're tired, and your eyes are already sliding shut before you even turn the first page. The title jumps out at you. "An?" you think, "shouldn't it be 'the'?" That's what you've always heard in movies at least. You shrug it off, and keep reading. "A cliche beginning," you mutter, shaking your head, but you continue reading. The clock reads 9:21. Your eyes are heavy. Reading in your bed was a bad idea. You wonder what the main character's name is. Your sleepy brain says it doesn't care.
Your mind wanders to what you're doing tomorrow. It's soccer sectionals. You wonder if Kate wants to go. You remember that she still has her French exchange student, Nicholas. You remember that he doesn't speak a lot of English, and cringe at the thought of another awkward conversation. You decide to text Kate tomorrow. You'll probably forget to do that tomorrow.
You're 10 pages into the reading. You flip the pages to see how many you have left. 12. "Leave him!" you want to tell the main character. But you can't. Because she's a character. And you're living her life, not the other way around. You know how it's going to end. You sigh, but keep reading. You can't fall asleep in class tomorrow. You have to finish the reading. You're so incredibly tired. Sleep sounds as nice as a massage. Your pillow looks like one.
"Stop it!" you say to yourself, "wake up!" But your eyes slide shut. Your book falls into your lap, but you don't feel it. You're asleep. You'll finish the reading tomorrow.

I think Teddy is Schizophrenic...

Call me morbid, but at the end of Salinger's “Teddy” I thought that Teddy killed himself. Before you hurriedly click out of this possibly pretty negative blog post, hear me out.

So I don’t actually think Teddy was this boy genius type of kid. Maybe I’m just super skeptical, but I definitely saw aspects of mental illness, specifically Schizophrenia (there’s actually a whole article on the relationship between Schizophrenia and some religions, it’s really interesting, google it). Schizophrenia is defined as a complex mental disorder characterized by a difficulty in recognizing reality, regulating emotional responses, and thinking in a clear and logical manner. I thought that Teddy’s extreme religious views (reincarnation, etc.) were a cause of his difficulty in recognizing reality. To me, it seemed as though Teddy was living in a fictitious world made up by himself, also supporting the thinking in a clear and logical manner part of Schizophrenia.

Schizophrenics often develop faulty beliefs based on hallucinatory experiences. Many researchers think that Schizophrenia can be a direct link to extreme religious beliefs. (Not saying you’re Schizophrenic if you’re religious, this is like super extreme cases.) Though alternatively, religion can be a trigger for Schizophrenia. So which came first for Teddy?

An estimated 20-40% of Schizophrenics attempt suicide at some point. If my (odd) theory was correct, and Teddy was indeed Schizophrenic, the idea of him committing suicide becomes far more plausible. Compared to the general population, Schizophrenics are eight times more likely to commit suicide.

According to WebMD, the four criteria for a typical suicidal Schizophrenic patient are:

• Being a male under age 30 (check)
• Have a higher IQ (check)
• Have been a high achiever as an adolescent and young adult (check)
• Be painfully aware of schizophrenia's effect on his mental state (maybe?)

Teddy fits into at least three of these categories. Again, I know this is morbid. Sorry! But I think Teddy finally grew tired of dealing with this day after day, and felt as though he couldn't talk to anyone because he was supposed to be this super smart young boy being interviewed by professors and doctors around the world, and killed himself. This would also explain why he knew the two possible dates it would happen, since it was in his control.

I know you guys are probably not schizophrenic, but If you or someone you know are thinking about suicide, please visit this website: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

(Also here's the link to the article I mentioned: http://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/viewdoc/download?doi=10.1.1.117.217&rep=rep1&type=pdf)

Mary Hudson and The Chief

Oddly enough, the topic of Mary and The Chief's relationship has been plaguing my mind since we finished reading and discussing "The Laughing Man". So, what exactly even happened? There are so many vague clues that I didn't even notice the first time reading it. When Elissa brought up the baby carriage thing in class was the first time I even thought of that as some sort of clue. Maybe I'm just not a very detail oriented reader. Anyway, what in the world happened to this relationship?
Their relationship never really seemed completely healthy to me. From The Chief (do we know his real name?) insisting that Mary Hudson not play in the baseball game, despite her instance that she wanted to, to the whole "dentist" thing, it seemed a bit odd. This book is older, published in 1948, and back then the notion of a woman's happiness tended to rely more on her spouses than her own. So shouldn't Mary just be happy to be with The Chief? Especially if it's only a few times a month? Maybe that's saying more about Mary than The Chief.
This has been a lot of rambling, basically my thoughts going straight into this blog post. Still though, we have the unanswered question of, what happened to their relationship? Was it just destined to end? Well, I've come up with a possible list of reasons Mary and The Chief broke things off. Read my ramblings ahead:

• Mary was cheating on The Chief (hence the "dentist" thing) 
• The Chief was cheating on Mary (hence the "dentist" thing) 
• Mary was pregnant with The Chief's child, but he didn't believe it was his. 
• Mary was pregnant with another man's child, but fooled The Chief into believing it was his. 
• Mary was pregnant with The Chief's child, and he just didn't want to have kids with her. 
• Mary was pregnant, but had an abortion without telling The Chief (hence why The Chief killed off The Laughing Man maybe) 
• Their relationship wasn't working, due to The Chief's busy schedule with the Comanche Club. 
• Mary was jealous of how much time The Chief spent with the Comanche boys versus with her. 
• The Chief didn't trust Mary when she went back to the city. 
• Mary didn't like The Chief controlling her. 
• The Chief didn't like Mary not listening to her. 
• They didn't see each other enough (Comanche Club and "dentist") 

Those are just some I've been thinking about. I'd love to hear more ideas, though. Stories with questions left unanswered always leave my brain spinning for days after. It's an interesting tactic of Salinger's to make the story from a young boy's perspective, instead of Mary or The Chief, and leaves the reader with a lot of questions. What happened? Why did The Chief kill The Laughing Man? And many more. 

Women in "In Our Time"

Is Ernest Hemingway's depiction of women in “In Our Time” indicative of the time period the stories were written in (1920s to 1930s) or of his relationships with women? A constant theme throughout the book “In Our Time” is women being seen as nothing more than “wives” or “mothers”. We especially see this in the story “Cat in the Rain”. This short story involves two characters; a young woman, labelled only as “the American wife”, not given a name, and her presumed husband George. In the story, they are the only two American people staying at a hotel in Italy. One evening the “American wife” sees a cat outside of their hotel room. Excitedly, she goes out in the rain in an effort to find the cat and bring it back to her hotel room.

As her efforts prove unsuccessful, we see more and more qualities of a Hemingway women conveyed. She is very timid, as seen when she agrees to go back inside from the rain with the maid even when she wants to find the cat, on page 92. Even when the woman is out of context with her husband, she is still only known as the American “girl”. Not even woman. Hemingway’s use of only these two terms for her seems to be a very poignant effort to keep her at arms distance. It seems as though he doesn’t really value her as a character, or some might go as far as to say he doesn’t truly value her as a person because of her status as a woman. The use of her name to constantly remind the readers that she is one, female, and two, a wife. Two things that back then probably, sadly, did define a person. It seems odd though that George got a name, and his wife, the main character didn’t.

Another theme in Hemingway’s writing is the classic “man gets annoyed with girl and usually says something rude” situation. In “Cat in the Rain”, George tells his wife, “Oh shut up and get something to read”, when she continues to ask questions and talk about the cat. Though in most relationships there are aspects of irritation and aggravation, the high number of occurrences of this very specific situation throughout “In Our Time” show a deeper theme about women.

So this leaves us with the question; is Hemingway writing like this from experience, or is that just how women were treated in the 1920s?

War isn't fiction, so why do we pretend it is?

Why do all war stories seem so realistic? Is it our lack of experience with war? What about war is so untouchable that even works of fiction seem true? Maybe it just says something about the excellence of the fiction piece. While reading Fire And Forget, more often than not, I would finish a short story thinking about the character I had just read about. Wondering how they were doing now. Wondering if they ever told their military spouse they cheated, or wondering if they ever fully re-emerged themselves back into civilian life, or if they even can.

Fire And Forget had this almost magical way of making me feel like I was reading someone’s diary. And yet, every time I finished a story, and breathed a sigh of relief because it was just fiction, a little part of me would think, this isn’t fiction for everyone. For many people the horrible things depicted in these short stories are things they go through on a daily basis. Things they can’t stop reliving, even as a veteran. It makes you step back and think. For every story that shocked me, for every story that saddened me, and for every story that just made me think, I reminded myself that this is someone’s reality. Though this author wrote it as a piece of fiction, there is someone out there living this supposedly fictional story. Maybe not everyone is out there killing the kindest chicken, but there are millions of veterans living a reality we like to think of as fiction.

Fire And Forget shows the harsh reality that as civilians, we like to avoid the issues of veterans and soldiers. Though the title “Fire And Forget” could refer to the soldiers firing weapons, or killing people and not thinking about it, I always thought it was talking about us, the civilians. I figured it was referring to the fact that we sent nearly 1.5 million troops, only to ignore the war, since it didn’t really pertain to us. Growing up, I can count on one, maybe two hands, the number of times people referenced the Iraq War. Because we sent them away, only to forget. We sent troops away to what we pretended was a fictional land, as troops lived a non-fictional life.

More than anything, reading the short stories from Fire And Forget has just reminded me how much I despise war, fictional or not.